…..Not My Mr. Right

not rightI think I pretty much know what I want…..I think.

“Mr. NotRight graduated from on of the top 10 universities in the state, he lives a comfortable life, he is respectful, he is a future self made millionaire, he is focused and has an eye for good things.

The 1st, 6ft3…. Total hunk, played for the schools basketball team. Every girl wanted a piece of him but I had him…….for approximately 7months and a week till it was all over.

“Mr. Not Right…..Socially, I don’t even know….

The 2nd, the warning signs were all around, “keep off”, “dangerous grounds do not trespass.” hmmmm but if am careful I won’t be so involved, after all it’s just a minefield how hurt could I possible get. A few misjudgements but I made it out with a few scars.

“Mr. Not Right is really what every girl that’s not me would probably yearn for. His history, perfect no flaws, no scandals.

The 3rd, my very own ‘Beau Burroughs’ (rumour has it) not with d drama just the age difference…..He was sort of my perfectly imperfect. Maybe it was because he was alot older, a been there done that, nothing really faced him. He let me throw tantrums, new when to shut me up, new the right words to say and always let me go out and play. Sadly, it lasted a totally of 36 months without a label.

The 4th, like the second, had all the signs, but I was pretty much used to this….So I played smart till I fell hard, hard right on my ass….Survived 11months

Dear “Mr. Not Right”, I know you might be good for me, I know that you would make me happy, I know that we might be together forever, but I don’t think your are the one right now. Everyone says you are perfect, you are charming but however I know your flaws, flaws you might not know you have. I might be wrong…….your flaw is, you think you are right and perfect for me.

Hey “Mr. Imaginary Right”, Am glad a met you today, I don’t know what it is but I can’t stop thinking about you. I think the biggest mistake was you fully introducing yourself, now all I can do is imagine your last name as mine.

Dear “Mr. Not Right”, Maybe you are not right because I have to make myself think to decide if I like you or not. Maybe because you don’t look like the type I would love to hate and hate to love. I really don’t see myself falling for you naturally, maybe eventually but not naturally.

The 5th, not really the 5th but let’s just leave it as that. He is far from meeting the requirements, physically, mentally and emotionally. But somehow I still think about him. This is how you Know it not worth it, I only think about him at odd times……ctrl delete Thank you.

Mr. Not Right, I don’t know if I would be upset if I hear you’ve moved on. I really am not motivated to see if it would work. Right now, my decisions may be influenced by my state of mind….so am just going let it be. Am not going to make a decision.

Is it wrong for a girl to believe in a fairy tale, to have a prince charming, her very own knight. One that would sweep me off my feet, cloud my thoughts and even when things go wrong still willing to forgive him.

Am I insane for thinking there might be someone else out there? 4 times I’ve been in a relationship, 4 times I’ve thought he was the perfect guy…till it was over.

I don’t want to settle for just ok. No! Mr. Not Right or Mr. Almost right! Am not silly, though I talk about fairy tails, I understand there is a reality, e.g It’s fine if he likes pizza and you don’t, if he wants to hang out without me, blah blah. I don’t want something conditional. Someone I can be me around, someone I can talk to, someone that is willing to bend over for me and me for him…..

Dear “Mr. Not Right……..am so sorry…..

XoXo

Advertisements


Categories: Factual Drama, Freshly Pressed

Tags: , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: